This page has been created specifically for those readers who need advice (i.e. mrworstnightmare). Feel free to fill this page with any topics you wish to be addressed, comments and questions you might have and I will do my best to respond with something humorous and/or witty.
I’m shocked no one else wrote here... how is it possible that I’m the first?
ReplyDeleteoh well, anyways...
I’m going on a date tonight with a girl that is 100% out of my league and I’m pretty sure it’s a pity date. do you think i should actually try hard to make something happen, or just stick to the "Naked Man"?
With that lack of confidence, it is quite shocking that you managed to secure a date with ANY girl, let alone one who is out of your league. Anyway, my opinion on the "Naked Man" is as follows. For those of you who don't keep up with prime time television, the Naked Man is an extremely desperate tactic where undersexed men come up with a lame reason to come up to their date's apartment (usually a bathroom excuse which is sure to de-sexualize any situation). He then randomly strips down and strikes a pose as if to say "sooo...can this happen?". Apparently this works 9 times out of 10 because the girl is caught off-guard and feels bad for this idiot. That being said...the naked man would NEVER work on me because, as I have mentioned countless times, I have (some) standards and I am known to be QUITE a tease. And I never feel bad about it. Ever. I actually think it is pretty hilarious.
ReplyDeleteSo Enamuel, unless this girl has her own apartment for which you can attempt to pull such a stunt, I don't know if it's such a good idea. Where would you strip down? In the restaurant? In the tunnel on the car ride home? It seems a bit complex. Perhaps try something more subtle like giving her excessive compliments, putting your hand on her leg, or maybe leaning in for a kiss. This will have a similar effect to the naked man because both catch the girl off-guard and make her feel extremely uncomfortable. Be aware that you might be on the receiving end of a slap to the face or a restraining order...But hey, might as well try.
Hope this helps
Hi There Ms Checkpleaaasssee,
ReplyDeleteYou do not know me but i was referred to this blog by one of my friends who reads it. I just wanted to ask you some advice. There's this who's perfect for me, and I really think that we connect. I don't know how she feels though and we're both in a place right now where we're looking for different things in life. Do you think i should go for it even though we're not looking for the same things right now? I don't want to go through life wondering what could have been.
Josh
Oh Joshua...
ReplyDeleteThis is quite the predicament. Here is what I have to say on the matter. You clearly like this girl despite being in different places in your lives. That in itself says a lot because it suggests that perhaps you are willing to over look these said differences. OR you are experiencing the classic "wanting what you can't have syndrome".
In relationships it is important to evaluate the pros and the cons. In my case the cons typically outweigh the pros which is why I am still single. But, enough about me unless I happen to be the lady in question that you are referring to. Every relationship has obstacles, but the key is to discover what you are willing to sacrifice of yourself in order to be with that person.
You say that you are in different paths in life right now. But is there a possibility of meeting at the crossroads? If there is, and you care enough to try, then go for it. However, if you know for certain that you both want COMPLETELY opposite things in life- then I don't recommend saying anything. You will just set yourself up to get hurt.
Let me know how it turns out
Hi check. I just started reading your blog(from the beginning). I'm trying to get a feel for your perspective, so i'm wondering what your background is and what age range you are in. Feel free to not answer the age thing- i know it's not appropriate to expect you to divulge that- but the blog is anonymous.(i think?)
ReplyDeleteHi, I came across your blog via thoughtcatalog and simply love it!
ReplyDeleteI am 25 and have never really been properly single in my adult life ... which is why amongst other reasons I decided to go on a break with my boyfriend with whom I have been with for like 4 years. Anyway, out of nowhere, I meet this guy at work, who is 11 years older than me, very successful, smart and gorgeous. I sense he likes me for he couldn't stop flirting with me. Then we start emailing each other with links to interesting articles about issues we are both passionate about. Then we meet up one night ... end up going to dinner, and I am so nervous. (this dude has written a bestselling critically acclaimed book when he was 31) anyway, he tells me that he was going to get married just 2 months ago and still trying to work things out, tells me that like me he doesn't think marriages work or monogamy in general. but things are 'complicated'. then he asks about me and I tell him about my 'break' with my bf. then he says he is really sorry but he has to go and comfort his 40 year old neighbour who is having some emotional breakdown. I was left disappointed. We parted saying we hope things get resolved for both of us. Any advice or insight would be immensely appreciated! xoxo
First of all thank you so much for the positive feedback! It really means a lot to me!
ReplyDeleteNow let's delve into your situation ... I think that based on what you wrote in your comment, you know very well what happened here. Everything was going great until you opened up the ex-files. That's when he bolted from the scene. In my opinion its probably because he doesn't want to deal with that kind of baggage or he thinks you are on the rebound. Regardless it comes off as him not wanting to put effort into possibly starting a relationship with you. His loss.
I just want to point out something I observed in your writing. You mentioned how this man does not believe in being monogamous and never plans to marry. You say that you feel the same way but is that really the case? Would you really be OK with that type of relationship? As a woman, it is in our nature to assume that a man will change for us. That suddenly this man will fall hopelessly in love with you and move mountains to be with you even though he has sworn off marriage. THIS LOGIC IS WRONG! Trust me. Men rarely change and they certainly don't change in regard to something as serious as being faithful. The fact that he deliberately said he doesn't think marriage or monogamy works is a serious red flag.
I know that it was probably very refreshing to exchange intelligent conversation with a more mature and experienced man. However, you should not ignore those red flags no matter how tempting (although red flags in general are always tempting to us women who at times tend to be masochistic).
I would stay far away from this man OR proceed with EXTREME caution.
Thank you so much for your reply :).
ReplyDeleteYou make some interesting points... maybe I am just kidding myself when I say I don't want anything serious... but a big part of me says I don't mind... I just want a fling..and an update, he basically told me later that although he finds me attractive, his life is pretty messed up at the moment..so we really can't do anything... After contemplating breaking up with my 'normal and average' boyfriend of 4 years... because I am sick of the same..I'm up for some unconventional stuff...as lame as this sounds, for once in my life, I want to be young and do seemingly stupid things..but I appreciate you looking out for me. Shall keep you updated :)